20 August 2010

Some days I wanna quit

"Some days I feel like shit,
Some days I wanna quit, and just be normal for a bit,
I don't understand why you have to always be gone,
I get along but the trips always feel so long,
And, I find myself trying to stay by the phone,
'Cause your voice always helps me to not feel so alone,
But I feel like an idiot, workin' my day around the call,
But when I pick up I don't have much to say,
So, I want you to know it's a little fucked up,
That I'm stuck here waitin', at times debatin',
Tellin' you that I've had it with you and your career,
Me and the rest of the family here singing "Where'd you go?"

"Where'd you go?" -Fort Minor

Some days this song is exactly how I feel. Today has been a really emotional day. My stomach is turning and I have yet to hear from my husband. All I wanna do today is cry. Some days, like today, I go from depressed to angry to out right raging mad. It's almost comical how much my mood can change some days. I guess that's normal during deployments. Today I am worrying about my husband, partly because I haven't heard from him and partly because I just have a bad feeling that is making me sick to my stomach. I had a conversation with a fellow military wife this morning and she asked me how I deal during deployment...honestly, I didn't have much of an answer. I'm sure you read my post on How to Survive Deployment and if you didn't you can read it here. All of those things I wrote are great and they help...but ultimately we are all bound to have bad days. I guess I just kind of deal with it because I have to. There isn't really a better answer. There are things that can make it easier but it's still not easy. Only a few more hours until today is over. For those of you also going through a deployment here is a computer hug for you. * hug* YOU are doing a great job and you will survive! We can all get through it! Hope you all have a spectacular weekend!!

1 comment:

  1. My boyfriend wears combat boots all the time actually. He was never even in the military, it bugs me so bad!