Time...

Well I guess it's time I finally come here and tell all of you what's been going on and why I haven't been here much. As you all know I had surgery and then ended up back in the hospital a few weeks after. I've now been out of the hospital for a few weeks and am feeling much better thankfully. But....beyond that things have been really crazy.

I am going to spare you all the details mostly because I'm just at a point where I don't want to be specific. A few days after getting out the hospital I discovered something my husband had done that is...NOT okay. I left. I took the kids and took off. About two hours into my drive he called and talked me into coming back. This was also coincidentally the same day my in laws came into town. So, I turned my car around and came back home. Since then my husband and I have been really building our relationship and things have been amazing. After three and a half years my husband is finally focused on US. He is making our relationship a priority. He has been romantic and sweet and supportive. He listens to me when I talk. It's truly been a 180 from what I'm used to. We have begun marriage counseling and after only one session I can tell it will be a big help. The difference between now and before is that he is now committed to making things work..more than ever before.

I am still guarded. I am hurt. I am weary..but I'm trying. And so is he.

So beyond this big mess we have been attending church for about 5 weeks now which is awesome. I grew up in church and was always very involved up until I moved in with my husband. So I am thrilled we have found a church we both feel comfortable in. I am also starting physical therapy for my back. Little Miss is going to be attending the local elementary school for speech a couple times a week(not a full day) and Little Man is crawling everywhere and starting to pull up on things.

Little Miss turns 3 at the end of this month and little man will be 1 in less that two months. Time is flying by and life keeps throwing not so good things at me....but I am strong and I am surviving.

In counseling when asked what my husband admires about me...he said he loves how strong and independent I am...and THAT made me feel even stronger.

I hope everything with all of you is going good and I hope you all had a Happy Easter. I am hoping to continue to update..I guess it just took a long time for me to admit everything in my life to myself let alone to all of you.