Day 01{Something I Hate About Myself}

I am going to participate in a 30 Days of Me challenge. It's going to be tough and it's going to get personal but I hope you will stick my by side through it. I saw this on two different blogs. The Young Retiree as well as Faith & Deployments will be doing this so make sure you check out their blogs(also, you can see what all 30 days are by clicking those links)! So, here it goes. Reflection in it's purest form. Not many of you who read this know me on a personal level. I really am an open book about most parts of my life but when it comes to talking about myself...I keep a lot deep down. As you will discover in this 30 Day challenge there are so many parts and past memories that make up who I am. So..I guess I should get started. Accept me as I am and prepare for me to get real.

Day 01... Something I Hate About Myself

The sad truth is...I had a hard time coming up with one thing to choose. There are quite a few things I wish I could change about myself. Out of everything I'd say something I hate is how overly emotional and sensitive I am. I like to think most of time the time I'm pretty reasonable but I have my moments where a little thing will set me off. I wish I wasn't this way but it's who I am and as much as I try to change it...I can't. Everyone has parts of themselves they hate but the truth is if we were all perfect wouldn't we be pretty boring? My husband cannot stand how emotional I am sometimes but the thing of it is, is that is just a part of me he needs to learn to not only accept but to nurture that and be aware of it. I have to say, he has gotten better at understanding this flaw about me but just like I am still learning to accept parts of him, it will take time.

I'm the girl who cries at every single Army Wives episode. I'm the one who can't watch A Baby Story on TLC without bursting into tears of the beautiful new life being born. I'm a sap. On another side of the emotional spectrum I get emotional about stupid things. If someone says they are going to do something(ie. hang out) and blow me off...I get really hurt. When my husband does something that bothers me I get overly emotional. It's like my past experiences made me this way although that is no excuse. This is a DAILY struggle for me. It's something I will continue to battle my entire life. I used to take medication for depression(several years ago) and I think that is part of why I am so emotional. I have break downs and moments where I'm too sad to move and my body just aches all over. I get overly stressed and emotional and it puts a physical toll on my body. It is a struggle and I pray one day I can be set free from this because it really holds me down.

This post was extremely hard for me to write and very personal. Thanks for listening and for withholding judgments. You are all so appreciated!!!! Have a good day : )